Your Kids are Hypocrites Just Like You
Lazy parenting leads to lazy children. Don't blame them for being fucked when it's your fault. We're all busy, but don't be surprised when they're busy too -- because that's how you taught them to pass the time.
Leveling the Field
I'll be the first to say I'm a lazy fuck. I hate getting out when I don't have to and I love to play games instead of doing the dishes or taking out the trash. I struggle with holding myself accountable because, well, I wasn't held very accountable for those types of things at a young age. That doesn't make me or my parents bad people. We're only human. We try to do what we think is right, or rather, what feels right.
So, What's the Problem?
The problem is that you're a hypocrite. You give them a device to pass the time but expect them to put it away on your time. Where is the accountability in that? A few years ago, I saw a family sitting at a restaurant: 2 adults, 3-4 children. Every single one of them was glued to their phone (or iPad). That in itself is another blog-post's-worth of content to write about, but the moral of the story is that you've taken the time to go to a family outing, yet everyone at the table is on another planet.
Then, when the screen time becomes a problem, you try to take it away, right? No more for you! Well now you've just fucked them. Think about it:
- You initially gave them a way to pass time
- You (probably) didn't set any restrictions on it
- Now it's become an annoyance for you
- Now you've taken away their coping mechanism
Here's what just happened: your child has now learned that it's okay to give and then take without consequences (because inherently, you as the authority figure won't face any consequences for taking it away).
And then eventually when they talk back or rebel in some form-or-fashion, you will become the hypocrite, because you enabled that. I'm not here to flame you, though, so keep reading. I'm not even a parent, so I can't really say too much. After all, most of this is just my opinion. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯
Self-Reflection
As I've grown up, I've come to understand that part of the process is learning to stop and reflect, even on the shitty parts of yourself. We get so caught up in trying to present the perfect image or "version" of ourselves and trying to please others that we forget that that's not even the goal. The goal is to be better. That's it. Accept that you're fucked, just like everyone else, and do something to better yourself. The more you try to pretend that you aren't a hypocrite, the less you're helping anybody.
In the End
It's a lot easier to stand around and notice everyone else's problems, isn't it? That's because you're a hypocrite, too.